“Between Us”
This performance art is base on “Light and Dark” and "Meet The Artist" by Mariana Abramović. In the performance, Abramović and her partner slapped each other back and forth; the performance ended when whelps formed in their faces. In the performance, me and my cousin will sit in front of each other in silence in the park, writing in a notebook and passing it back and forth. We are writing about feelings and problems we have with our family.
The video ended up being 30 seconds. We had to remain stone face doing it. It was hard at in the first 3 tries, the original video ended being longer then we planned.(the video ended up being cut to fit.)
The meaning behind the performance is about issues In the family/generational trauma. In my family and the black community, issues such as mental health, homosexuality, and the patriarchy are prevalent problems but are ignored and are faced with ignorance. Coming forward with anything mentioned causes arguments and divides til the point of silence. The elders in the family have more say than the younger generation. For example, when trying to tell my mother or aunts that I am depressed and going through something, I am told, “You have nothing to be upset over. You don't have bills, you don't have children, you're not depressed.” Asking for therapy was given the same feedback and was called “white people shit.” Many of my cousins and I were told this growing up due to our parents not seeking therapy or thinking that their parenting was better compared to their treatment growing up. My mother would always tell me that my grandmother and grandfather would always say to her, “I will give you something to cry about.” when she was upset, she would complain about how her brother was more praised than her and her sisters because he was the only boy. Even though she acknowledged the bad habits of her parents, she had copied their behavior of being emotionally distant, yelling at accidents/mistakes I made as a kid, and only praising her son. When trying to tell her these destructive behaviors that she has and how they affected me and my siblings, it goes through one ear and out the other and sparks an argument. My cousin in the video has similar issues with her mother, but she is more understanding than mine.
Issues among the black community are rooted in racism and slavery; for example, the sexulization/adultification of black children(mostly black girls) and colorism come from racism and slavery, yet they are prevalent issues in black families/communities. Dark-skinned black women are stereotyped as loud, angry, ugly, and masculinized, while light-skinned women are considered more desirable and beautiful. In my family, my cousins always made fun of me for being “too dark,” and the same for other family members who are dark-skinned. Black children, especially black girls, are already adultification common in black families by certain things being considered “too fast.” These “things” are ordinary; for example, red was considered too fast, so red nail polish, lipstick, dresses, etc, were deemed inappropriate and “sexual.” Still, it’s different when it comes to white girls wearing them. It was the same with straightening hair; many black girls and I had to put a bump at the end of our hair so it could be appropriate. I had many arguments with my mother about how the black community/families are adultifying young black girls and how it made no sense. I always brought up the argument, “Why is it inappropriate for black girls but ok for white girls?” and her response was always, “It’s different.” When I push back by saying, “Why is it different?” She finishes the conversation and says, “Leave it alone.”
In the video, me and my cousin are writing in a notebook and passing it back and forth. In the notebook, we are writing down issues we have with our family and the problems and trauma that our parents, aunts, uncles, and older cousins have. The reason why we are writing it in silence and passing it is to represent how these issues are silent with anger and ignorance and how we can only communicate this with each other. Like stated before, the video is inspired by "Light & Dark" and "Meet The Artist" by Mariana Abramović. In "Light & Dark" Abramović and her partner was slapping each other back and forth til welts formed on their face. Even though not as extreme in the performance, are writing painful Meester to each other and going back and forth. Even though it's not physically it emotionally pain. The "Meet The Artist" inspired part of the performance is the eye contact and my cousin is made as we passed the notebook back and forth.
While performing I thought of the section “The principle: make the invisble visible” from “The Art of Activism: Your All-Purpose Guide To Making The Impossible Possible”. The qoute that stuck with me the most is “Problems are often hard to see. Racist violence frequently happens in back alleys nd after the sun goes down. Economic inequality is often the result of abstract forces. Ecological degeradation takes place over long periods of time. And most people would simply rather look away from things that make uncomfortable”(109). The issues that I’m trying to bring to light are issues that are deeply rooted and need to be acknowledged to break the cycle. The y ounger generation of black people is breaking the cycle of generational trauma by going to therapy and condemning and trying to fix their parents’ actions/behavior. These conversations are uncomfortable and many refuse to acknowledge that they are there. The discomfort reminds of Martin Lurther King Jr’s qoute that he wrote in Birmingham jail cell, “Like a boil that can never be cured so long as it is covered up but must be opened with all its ugliness to the natural medicines of air and light, injustices must be exposed, with all the tension its exposure creates, to the light of human conscience and the air of national opinion before it can be cured.”(109)
Bonus:
"Between Us"
Grab a note book
And grab a pen
Go to your closet person in your life
Find a place of silence
Find a place of peace
Sit down face to face of each other
And one begins write
One sit and stare at the one writing
Pass the notebook back and forth
And write down feelings deep within
Once it's over
Destroy the paper together
Watch the pain within go away
And continue as nothing happened
Just remember
Between us
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